The Trickery: Part Deux...finally.

Sorry for the extreme delay in getting back to the blog, but life has been hectic around here as of late. Anyway, help keep me accountable to blogging, would you?

That night, I went home with my stomach in knots. This harmless meeting turned into something much bigger than I expected in a very short period of time. There was substance between Adam and I and I knew I wasn't the only one feeling it. He told me he was going on a camping trip with his Dad the next day and would be gone for a few days with no cell service. Part of me thought maybe he would just go on his trip and never bother getting hold of me once he got home. Thank God that part of me was wrong, and I got an email the day he got home telling me how much he missed talking to me, how he couldn't get me off his mind, and that he hoped I didn't forget about him. Uh, of course I didn't. Who had time to forget about him between replaying our conversations, soul searching, feeling like I was going to throw up for excitement slash anxiety?  I was sick thinking about how I was going to have to find a way to break up with my boyfriend, because even though he was an incredible guy, if I felt like this for Adam for even a minute, I wasn't doing anybody a favor holding on to a relationship that wasn't right. In my heart I knew it was over a very long time ago but I had a lot of pressure on me to keep things the way they were. My mom loved him because he was a good Christian boy and he treated me well. My friends were his friends, and it was really hard being the bad guy so I kept on pretending that what we had was everything I wanted. Logically, he would be quite a husband for someone eventually. Emotionally, I knew that someone wasn't me.  Thanks to Mister Massey, I figured out there was a whole other world of feelings and logic out there for me and I couldn't UN-feel my very real feelings.
    Adam met Lindsay and me for walks several days that next week, and by this point Adam was tricked. Hehe, He was pretty crazy about me and I could tell. The second time we walked, he tried to hold my hand. Too obvious something was going on. I only would lock pinkies with him, because that's sort of noncommittal, right? (We still hold pinkies!) Plus, being with him made me so nervous that my palms were so sweaty and it embarrassed the crap out of me. He mentioned to me that his church was having revival that week and he would like me to come. I was uneasy, but I thought if it meant I got to spend time with him then I would find a way to make it happen. Boldly, I asked my boyfriend if it was okay, and he didn't care...at least that's what he said. Sweet. And kinda shady.  Adam held the door open for me and lead me by the hand to his usual seat; naturally it was the front row. I was wearing a dress, kitten heels, and a little black blazer and he was in a red button down and tight jeans . Lordy. We sang some hymns and I tried to focus. I remember trying to sing the best I could in case he heard me, but my throat was sore, haha. We sat down as the pastor made his way up to speak, and Adam put his long arm around my shoulders, wiggled closer to me and held my hand with his free hand. I felt protected and cherished. And like a girl.
  I was sad the message was over, unfortunately for the wrong reasons. We shook hands with Adams friends and coworkers, and headed downtown for our nightly walk. We were walking the Walnut Street Bridge just talking. Talking about how he felt about me and was willing to wait for me to decide on how to handle the boyfriend situation because he knew this was a relationship worth pursuing. I kept trying to feed him some line about how I was going off to college soon and I never intended to jump from one long term high school relationship to a real world serious one. He saw right through me, he always has.
  It made me laugh so hard thinking of how smooth I thought he was. Every time we stopped walking to talk, he would come right next to me and put his arm around my waist. I decided I should probably not stop walking anymore, haha. My little heels kept getting stuck in between the boards on the bridge so I was barefoot and holding my shoes. We were laughing so hard while we were people watching that time got away with us, but I had a 10 pm curfew so we had to get going. Adam made some corny joke about a couple that passed us, and I laughed and turned my head. When I turned back around, I was met with my last first kiss.
  It was a REALLY good first kiss. Ladies, y'all know what an awkward first kiss is like. This was not one of those. I smacked him on the arm and told him he can't kiss me like that. Then I kissed him back. About 10 times on the way to his truck.
   That week we met every chance we could. We went hiking and walking as usual. We were ridiculous. We just laughed and kissed and laughed some more to the point we were pretty much sickening I think. Then, I think Jesus had enough of my uncharacteristic dishonesty, so one night as Adam was kissing me goodbye I heard a familiar high pitched voice. "Eeeek! Reshae Flegal!!!"

I guess I will have to wrap this up next time! Unless you're bored with me. :)

How I Tricked Adam into Marrying Me

Today is my sweetheart's 26th birthday, so what better way to spend a blog post than looking back at how we got to where we are today?

Its pretty long, so I will break it up over a few posts, deal?

Part One

It was early 2006 and I was a junior in high school. I had a friend named Lucy who was in band with me, and I thought her brother was so gorgeous. And that butt. Don't get me started. I always joked around with Lucy about her brother, and she would relay things he said about me like, "She is so sweet" or worse, "She is cute." He was two years older than me, so I knew 'cute' meant cute like a kindergartener. I knew I would never stand a chance with a guy that looked like that, but it was always fun to joke with Lucy. When I met her parents before a band competition, I acted like a typical high schooler and flirted with her dad, and was overly energetic and enthusiastic about meeting them. I half jokingly asked if Adam (Lucy's brother) had broken up with his long time girlfriend yet so we could get married because I would be a great daughter-in-law. Bold huh?

   Around Christmas that year, Lucy ended up being very sick and had to have surgery. I made Lucy a card and drew some awesome stick figures on it and added, "p.s. I would make a great addition to your family..." just to gross her out. ;) A couple of weeks passed, and I got a Myspace friend request from Adam Massey. I could have died right then. He only had two friends at the time, Lucy and I. That was a good sign, right? This boy was new to Myspace and I was one of the first people on his mind? Big deal in 2006, y'all. I got a message from him saying, "So I hear you think you would make a good addition to the family, huh?" I could have killed Lucy. We exchanged little flirtatious messages, but at the time we both were in 'relationships' with other people. He gave me his number, but I said I was a lady and if he was interested in talking to me, he would have to call because I am old fashioned. I think this was where he started getting tricked. haha! Men love that hard-to-get stuff. He texted my Mom's phone once while I was at church with my boyfriend and asked if I wanted to see a movie some time. I literally didn't even know how to text him back on my Mom's super awesome Cricket phone with an antenna.

   He broke up with his girlfriend somewhere along the way for good, and we would occasionally email each other. Good ole Lucy made a pact with him behind my back, that if things didn't work out with this skanky girl from Bilo, that he would take me on a date for real. Maybe I shouldn't call that redheaded skanky girl a skank, but it is my blog, and I'm calling it like I see it! Anyway, he saw me at a combined chorus and band concert I was in and talked to me. He hadn't responded to my last email, so I was a little short with him and focused my attention on his parents. I threw in a comment about him not messaging me back, and walked to my car.

    My Mom informed me when I got home that night, that a boy named Adam had called while I was gone. Later, Adam told me that my Mom was like, " No, Reshae is not here because she is out on a DATE with her BOYFRIEND!" That is one thing I regret about our relationship. I should have been honest with my old boyfriend about Adam and broke things off a long time ago, but I really didn't think Adam would ever be my boyfriend one day, let alone my husband! But still, it ruined my witness as a Christian and I lost a lot of friends because of 'cheating' on my boyfriend, so I regret the way I handled that for sure. But I was 18. You live, you learn!

    I was kinda unhappy at this point in my life because of some issues at home and with my "friends" and I started losing a lot of weight from all my anxiety. I started walking 6 miles a day with my friend Lindsay and going to the tanning bed. I felt like crap on the inside, but my outside was actually starting to look like something I felt confident in. I emailed Adam and said he should meet us at the track and walk with us that night after church. I will never forget how I felt when I saw this handsome guy in a red Georgia hat sitting on the tailgate of his truck with his feet dangling. I knew I was in trouble right then. We walked around the track for a while, and I had to say 'huh?' Probably 117 times in those 3 miles we walked. Adam used to be the worst mumbler ever. But I sure did think it was cute. He was so easy to talk to and he had the same sense of humor as me. Lindsay and I went to sit down for a minute, and we of course had to girl talk about him. "So what do you think Linds?" "I can't really hear what he's saying but does it really matter when he looks like that?!" Lindsay said. Haha! We hugged goodbye and he didn't hug me in a way I was used to at all. His hands were almost too low on my back and I probably snuggled a little too close. He smelled really good. I blushed all the way home. :)

To be continued! Kudos if you made it through this part.

A Resolution post, duh.

Some people think that New Year's resolutions are silly, but I am taking mine super seriously this year. I have been looking forward to the mental clean slate that comes with a New Year for weeks, even though it really isn't any different than any other day. Wherever this motivation is coming from, I will take it. If you're taking the time to read this, I hope you will encourage me to keep on keepin' on because I have a long journey ahead. Okay, are you ready for the list? Here goes nothing:

1. Lose 70 pounds. Sev-en-teeeey. That is a lot. I am aiming for two pounds a week and hoping to hit my goal by fall. I am working on reigning in my polar attitude about food. Riley is officially a year old so I am not his only source of nutrition so it is time to 'diet'. What resolution list is complete without a weight loss goal?

2. Run a 5K. I want to run with my husband without sucking so much wind that he is afraid I am about to kick the bucket. Running with boobs hurts, in case you were wondering.

3. Finish my doula certification. I love the hands on training and experience I have received so far, but I really want to have it official. I want those letters behind my name. ;)

4. Sing karoke. I never have.

5. Read my Bible every day. I read plenty of ridiculous things every day. I will make more time for the Word.

6. Romance my husband more. I want to constantly be thinking of ways to show him how much I appreciate him and I want there to be no doubt in his mind how absolutely madly in love with him I am.

7. Play outside with Jackson and Riley every chance I get. Boys need to explore outside and it always seems to be 'too hot, too cold, too windy, too dark, too...outsidey' for us to go.

8. Say 'yes' more. I have been playing it safe for too long and I am ready to take every opportunity presented to me. I owe it to myself to be brave.

9. Blog twice a week. For my mental health, for my children to look back on, and for you nosey nellies who actually care what I have to say.

10. Watch Facebook less. Man, it is a time suck and a much worse habit than chewing my finger nails.

Okay, I am sure there are millions more things I can improve about myself and most of you would agree, but I think this is a start. What are your goals for the new year? Any advice you have to offer on ways to help me reach my goals is also welcome!

Happy New Year, y'all!

An Introduction

Hello random blog readers!I am going to assume all of you know me or at least know of me since this is brand new, but I will take a second to briefly introduce myself in case I become an overnight success and thousands of strangers begin following my blog faithfully. (Insert eye roll here.)

My name is Reshae and I am a technologically challenged 24 year old stay at home mom and new birth doula. I am married to a handsome, goofy, and incredible man named Adam. Adam is quiet at first but he has plenty of hilarious observations to share in moments when you really aren't supposed to be laughing. I really hit the jackpot when I tricked him into marrying me. He gave me two beautiful boys that keep me laughing. Jackson is almost 3 and he is the most energetic boy I know. He has a very large vocabulary and loves to talk so there is never a quiet moment but I love hearing his insights on the world around him. Riley is 1 and he is the most laid back and squishy little guy in the world. He is a very busy baby but he has a completely different temperment than his big brother. He started walking tonight actually so my life is going to get rowdy in a hurry!

I am passionate about birth, breastfeeding, and natural parenting. I love being a birth doula and I am excited to share my journey of starting a new career with all of you. I am constantly learning new things and I am an eager beaver for information right now, so I hope to share little tidbits with you. Then you will probably sigh and roll your eyes because you already know everything. But hey, my enthusiasm is kinda charming, right? Don't worry- this won't all be about placentas and diapers. 

Anyway, I have plenty more to say but I am annoyed at typing on this touchscreen. I am a grandma. Talk to you guys next year! Hardy har har.